I wouldn't read this, Best Friend.
Being done feels so strange like giving up but not really because this needs to be done i want to move on i want to grow up i want to forget and try to never think about it ever again because no nothing is ever really over but i am so tired and i don't know how else to declare myself to be important and really how could you not know but i guess it's a lost cause and that kills me fucking kills me you're a lost cause and i don't know how to say that to you because it wouldn't even make a little bit of difference i say these words to you and you don't even listen the phones through which we speak are a metaphorical brick wall i can't even tell you how to say goodbye but seriously fuck you and i refuse to feel sorry for that even though i am going to have to apologize over and over i am so sorry i wasn't strong enough i'm so sorry i didn't stand by so sorry i gave up but how do you stand by someone who doesn't even respond when you sob and tell that person that you're killing me this hurts me so much after everything it doesn't make one bit of difference you can't even apologize for your actions
and that probably hurts the most that you can't even tell me you're sorry your self-righteousness knows no bounds and of course you don't see that you're hurting everyone who ever cared about you you're the same and look around because no one is here anymore no one can do or say anything because you're gone you're so gone i tried to pull you back but it didn't work because anyone who can't apologize for this doesn't exist anymore
i tried i tried so hard and it won't even matter it didn't help and if it did you never told me thank you and the truth is i could probably just deal with this if you could just say thank you and i'm sorry for what i put you through but you can't and you won't because those around you are taken for granted until they leave but even when i leave when you think of me all you'll see is someone who couldn't get past her anger not someone whose heart broken too many times by the same person can't risk that again and i hate the way you'll probably think of what i'm doing but
i know a lost cause when i see one.
you're so gone sweetheart you're gone forever and i can't i just can't and i hope you see what i see someday but until then i'm not doing this anymore and
this is all your fault.
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